22nd Oct 1952
Dearest Geeta,
I have been missing you since the afternoon. As long as you are near me I am happy though I quarrel with you each and every minute. I very nearly want to ring you up, but then I was doubtful if I could get you on phone or not. I hope the plane journey was pleasant enough. I am having a bad spell of lose. I won’t be able to shoot till the 26th as my set is not ready. I don’t know what is happening everything i do. I feel I am going to be no where after this picture is over.
If I try to forget all this business worry, I can’t but thunk that Lally’s marriage date is approaching soon and I haven’t yet been able to arrange anything.
Whenever you with me all these worries I forget in quarreling with you. I think you have become sick of me and you just tolerate me because you have to marry me. I am very sorry if I disappoint you but I am full of weakness. I hope you will always pardon me. I know you are very good. I love you for it. Perhaps I don’t deserve such a good girl like you. I think you derserve someone much better than me. Why did you encourage me? But, I need you, more than than you need me! And you know that. As I write this I am looking at your photo on table. I love you in that particular snap, what more shall i write. I am avoiding … and I believe I won’t till you are here. But you must pardon me for my weakness I am trying to change. But, after all I am weak …
Let me close here with all my love to you my sweet darling, With Kisses.
Yours Guru Dutt
This letter is part of letters Guru Dutt wrote to Geeta Roy (Later Mrs. Dutt) and was written when they were engaged to be married. Guru was one of Hindi cinema's finest film-makers. His letters underlines the moodiness and self-doubt that Guru always carried inside him and also reflected in his movies.